Opposites Attract: The Secret to a Successful Marriage

Today's Pens Guest is Carla Buckley, whose debut novel, THE THINGS THAT KEEP US HERE, blew me away. It's truly one of the finest and most gripping novels to come down the pike lately. Think of a heartfelt women's fiction voice combined with the kind of nightmare future that could really happen right here in America - and globally - and you've got a thriller that's nearly impossible to put down. Plus, Carla's funny and fun, and there's definitely going to be some Pens In Action shots of her and a Pen or two this summer at Thrillerfest!

Carla's led an exciting life, with too many experiences to summarize so you'll just have to read about it at her web site. One of our favorite details is that Carla wrote a whole lot of books before selling. Here at PensFatales we are big fans of perseverence!

So we’re coming up to Valentine’s Day, and the gifted and talented authors at Pens Fatales (special shout out to Sophie!) have asked me to write up a little something on love and romance. While those who know me well choke on their coffee hearing that, let me defend myself by saying, I do know a little bit about the subject.

After all, I’ve been married for over twenty years. This fact sometimes amazes me. Other than explaining it by saying that we simply don’t have the energy to push each other under a train, it comes down to the fact that we’re completely different, which gives a certain edge to our relationship. We’re constantly on guard to see where the other one is headed.

My husband is tall, tan, and athletic. I’m…not. He can sleep anywhere, anytime. World War III can be playing on the Xbox five feet away and he’ll snore right through it. I need darkness so thick you can cut it with scissors, tomblike silence, and socks. My husband has no emotional relationship with food, which, let me tell you, puts a real strain on our marriage. I mean, who can live with someone like that? He can resist a bag of Kettle chips for weeks, while my food pyramid is solidly founded on potato products and chocolate. Then there’s the fact that he thinks before he speaks. What’s up with that?

All these differences are manageable. Annoying, yes, but nothing a super-sized order of French fries can’t fix. Really, it’s the fact that he’s generous and selfless that is a problem for me. Who can live with someone who always considers other people first? It leaves the mean stuff up to me, and because we have kids, there’s a big demand for that sort of thing around here.

When the media began talking about how the world was overdue for a deadly flu pandemic, I knew I was doomed. Not just because I was worried I’d get sick, but because I’d be fighting the great fight. My husband would be the one shoveling neighbors’ driveways, giving them our last bottle of ibuprofen, offering to drive them to the hospital. I’d be the one hiding our food so he couldn’t give it away, misplacing our car keys so he couldn’t loan out our car with the scant half-tank of gas, and spread-eagling myself across the doors so he couldn’t swing them wide open to ask passersby in for hot chocolate.

I channeled this anxiety into my debut novel, THE THINGS THAT KEEP US HERE, where a married couple battles not only a pandemic, but one another. Peter wants to save the world. Ann wants to save just one tiny piece of it--their children. Think War of the Roses meets Outbreak, and you pretty much have the level of tension in the Brooks’s household.

Writing THINGS was cathartic. Figuring out Peter helped me understand my husband better. Giving Ann a voice made me feel less driven to raise my own. In a sense, my novel might have saved my marriage. That, plus it gave me some really great ideas on where to hide the car keys.

What about you? Is your relationship founded on the notion of opposites attract, or misery loves company?